we love tennis

Monday night I was able to take Nathan and Kaylee up to the tennis courts. We were able to go last fall and spring pretty regularly but the summer was really busy so we are just now getting back up there. Monday was our first attempt to start 'coaching' nathan on some of the fundamentals. My dad is an assitant coach for the youth clinics at the park; so he couldn't wait for his chance to get Nathan started. Nathan was up for the challenge and did quite well. We spent almost 30 minutes on drills then just did fun stuff. After tennis we went to the park nearby and played there a bit. I made a slide show of some pics I was able to get....As you may notice, Kaylee was in the stroller most of the time, she had fallen asleep and slept most of the tennis time. We really missed her; she loves picking up the balls and that saves us a lot of work!!!

chapter in review :P

Well, one of my most recent post; raising some of my parenting thoughts really lead me to a couple great books. The first that I am reading is Revolutionary Parenting by George Barna. I am told it really focuses on raising spiritual champions vs raising well behaved kid....what a concept! Next two I have on the list to read are Don't Make Me Count to Three by Ginger Plowman (recommended by a sweet friend) and also Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp. I just started reading Revolutionary Parenting so if you want to join me, I am on the 2nd Chapter. Don't worry, I am a SLOW reader; you will catch up!

One of the points that this book has already redirected me to is that the responsibly of raising spiritual champions belongs to the parents, TAKING place in the HOME! This means first off that I better be a spiritual champion myself.

In Chapter Two, Barna begins to illustrate for us the coach/proteges relationship as it relates to the parent/child relationship. Merely hoping to raise a spiritual champion is not enough; you need to have clear goals, commitment and involvement.

We all too often hear the quality time vs quantity time argument. Barna writes, "Your impact on your children's lives is proportional to the depth of the relationship you have fostered with them." I need to devote substantial amounts of time building a relationship with my child.

Having two under five, this point really could be easily overlooked. The things I do with my kids that require substantial amount of time sometimes are not the most intriguing/interesting things to me but as I well know, they mean everything to my kids. Coloring, playing with cars and trains, dressing up dolls and playing house all are things my children love to do. How easy is it for me to let them play together by themselves while I get things done! Right now, I could think of so many ways I could impact their spiritual lives not only by showing them I am interested in them and the things they enjoy but also working in spiritual truths and principles into their hearts as I invest some time in them. Definitely, this is something I am convicted about!

Yes, quality in the quantity is important but just a couple minutes of quality time a day is not going to do it. I, of course am drawn to a tennis analogy!!! hahaha I have spent hours, weekly working on a particular stoke! I can't just do the perfect stroke for five minutes and expect it to be first nature for me; i have to spend many hours, doing that stroke perfectly before it is my nature to do it that way every time.

I know it will be easy for me to equate the long days I have with my children as a SAHM with spending many hours of quality time with them!!! But, who am I kidding - - not myself, not God and most certainly NOT MY CHILDREN!!!! I have to start personally evaluating the moments I am given with my children and with what devotion I am giving them; minute by minute!!!

WOW, and that was just the first two chapters! I am glad I have this blog to help me really absorb this book and the things God is trying to teach me through it. I am reminded of a quote a veteran mom told me when I had just had my 2nd child (16 months after my first)
"The days you have with your little ones at home are the longest days you will ever experience but the years while you have them will go by faster then you could ever imagine"
Ok, that may not be as eloquently put as she did but that is the jest of it and I haven't found it written anywhere else. That quote really drives home the importance of my role as a parent to make the most of the days I am given with these two precious gifts from God!

all for the love of jesus....

or fruit snacks :) Finally remembered to take some time to video tape Nathan and his preschool bible verses. He is really good at them but gets a little distracted when I try to film him. I told him if he did it for me he could get some fruit snacks, explaining his final statement....

i had to ask

Kaylee is not her best self in the car! We struggle with getting her not to cry/whine in the car. Well, today *like many days* she was over the top so I said "Kaylee, Do you want mommy to stop the car and give you a spanking?" She pulled herself together and then said "No, I want you to pull the car over and give me some M&M's!"

best bday present ever

Yesterday I turned 26! My kids have been singing "happy birthday" to me all weekend, ever since Daniel's parents had me over for dinner on Saturday. I finally decided to get it on video. Kaylee is still patiently awaiting her December birthday. She has only been talking about it since we had nathan's bday in August. I know a day doesn't go by without her talking/asking about it. Even last night after celebrating my b-day all day, Kaylee excitedly told Daniel her pink birthday was next!

equal is not equal

Right beside hypocrites, I think legalist are two of the top reasons people don't like Christians or don't won't to go to church. Tonight, Dr. Brunson's message was out of 1 Cor 13; I wish I could as eloquently join this passage to the Fruit of the Spirit as he did. Something that he did say that I dwelled on and has stayed with me through out this evening is "Legalism is a sad, cheap imitation for the Fruit of the Spirit"

Up to this point, I have not really been comfortable with calling people legalistic or using the term. In the way most people use the word, I was raised with some degree of legalism in my life, along with many people I am close to. I used to excuse it by using the definition I understood; Legalism is only when someone thinks that following their list of religious rules brings salvation. I can not say that I or anyone I am close to has ever come across that extreme degree of legalism!

Back to the Sermon, Dr Brunson was preaching on the Church of Corinth, how they were so blessed with spiritual gifts but there was a lack of Spiritual maturity. I guess that is where the connection of legalism comes! *now I remember, The Fruit of the Spirit is how we can see the presence of God in someones life not by the rules they live by or cling to* He in no way spent the whole sermon on legalism, which I am glad for. I don't like bashing legalist because they are just misguided brothers/sisters in Christ and need to be approached with a great degree of love/patience.

Walking away from the message tonight, I really was able to expand my definition of legalism. (I know this is not in anyway new to most of you but I will continue bloggin.) Legalism is also when someone believes themselves to be spiritually mature because of the rules/convictions they follow and think that those that do not uphold their rules/convictions are not spiritual.

I know in my own life it is much easier to feel spiritually mature because i have checked off the list of things I do (all of which I usually find easy to do anyway) But, how is my relationship with Christ, do I have a pure heart? I don't think I have ever gone as far as to judge others spiritual life by my own set of rules but I do need to examine my personal legalism. Replace it with a deeper relationship with Jesus and not such a superficial spiritual life as the one produced by following rules.

I am still left hanging with how this effects the raising of my children. I want them to obey their authorities and the Word of God. I have outlined many rules I want them to follow now and already have worked out some of the dreaded list of rules I want them to follow in the years to come! I don't want to raise my kids in a legalistic home. I have seen in SO many people how legalism causes them to leave the church and disconnect from the family when they have their own freedoms. I sometimes find my self favoring legalism because myself and my husband turned out 'good' (by the legalistic view point) so it must have worked and saved us from public sins that so often destroy a person.

However, my ultimate prayer is that my children will discover the love God has for them and in return fall in love with Him. When you are in love with God you want to please him and you seek Him for the way you should live your life and not a set of rules. But, I want to cling to those rules until they find this out for themselves lol.

Someone needs to write or recommend me a book that really teaches me how to raise good kids without legalism because in many ways that is the model I have for raising good kids and I don't want to take the chance that my kids will turn out 'good' just like me or Daniel. I know, aside from daily prayer over my parenting life and seeking in the scripture there is no better way to learn how to raise a family but it would be nice to have some supplemental material. lol.

6 Quirks

tagged by allison

this should be fun, sleep deprived and writing about my quirks....I may edit this later!

1. When daniel gets up to take his shower in the morning I have to scoot over to his side of the bed, use my pillow and snooze on his side of the bed for about 10-15 min until it is my time to take a shower.....ahhhhh, maybe not so much - I don't know why I do it, just do. Sometimes I think it is my final way of taking the Whole Bed!

2. I can not stand when ladies scratch their legs when they have pantyhose on

3. I have terrible nightmares; at least once a week. I have thrown a pillow at the front of the bed, rolled on top of daniel and fallen off the other side of the bed onto the floor *there was a man standing beside my bed, staring at me lol*
I have gotten better by keeping the doors shut (bathroom and bedroom) I used to leave it open to hear the children but when I woke up one night turning on both kids lights and telling daniel to get kaylee while I get nathan because I saw a man in the bathroom, the doors had to be shut, it has gotten better.


4. When I don't make my husband's lunch, I will call him while he is at work just to hear where he ate out and what he had for lunch. I also find myself calling him even when I do make his lunch to see how he liked it or if he has ate it yet. lol


5. I am terrible with remembering important dates; birthdays, anniversaries, deaths. I don't remember dates, numbers well. I do however, buy random gifts for people when I see something I think they would like and give it to them then.


6. I don't like capital letters, especially 'A' I like my name better ashlee - I just think it looks more balanced,the four short lowercase letters on the end the two tall lowercase letters the middle. Ashlee doesn't look as nice, i don't like the pointy top of the "A'. Some capitals are ok but for a lot of things I don't use capital letters.

I bet I could come up with at least 6 more!! haha

I tag melissa...
--Link to the person who tagged you.
--Post the rules on your blog.
--Share six non important things/habits/quirks about yourself.
--Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs.
--Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.